On The Road

Hello, there.  I am Celeste.  I'm just going to go ahead and say it:  I don't like to talk about things.  Seriously.  Please note the extreme irony here - me writing a blog, talking about things.  I am usually the one people come to when they need to talk about things.  *more irony.  The reason why I know that God is at the forefront of this project is the fact that I do not, with every fiber of my being, want to be sharing all my business with you. No offense.  I'm sure you are great.

So yesterday was my "Day 1" of giving up control.  I have to admit, the strange thing about all of this is not having a plan.  I love plans.  Well, let me clarify:  I love the idea of having a plan.  Follow through on those plans much, you ask?  Oh, mostly never.  Anyway, waking up without a rigid plan was really strange.  I mean, what is this - a diet, a program?  Can it be this simple?  Just listen to God?  Everyone in the house was still asleep so I decided to get outside & go for a walk.  I turned on some music and headed down the road.

Then it happened.  I don't really know how to describe this but to say that it was as if I had stepped out of my house and into the very presence of God. Bethel Redding's song "One Thing Remains" filled my ears with the promises that I so easily forget.  "Your love never fails, never gives up, never runs out on me" - "My debt is paid, there's nothing that can separate my heart from Your great love."

Then I saw him. I could see God standing on the road, arms open wide, waiting for me.  I wanted to run toward him.  He was waiting for me out there, on the road.  Tears were running down my face as I was reminded that I am not forgotten and no matter how big a mess I have made of my life, His love is never going to run out on me.  For a person like myself, who lives with guilt & condemnation, this is a big deal.  With every step I was reminded that He is enough.  He has this under control.  Needless to say, best walk ever.

Side note: I am also thankful for sunglasses big enough to hide my emotional breakdown from my neighbors.  Lord knows they were probably shocked enough just seeing me exercise.

So, here it is. I'm excited and terrified at the same time but I know that God is close by.  He is waiting for me on the road.

Celeste