In the past I have thought once I tackle an issue in my life, I won't have to deal with it ever again. I am realizing that's not so true. The big hint was thinking back through all the times I've started a new diet or prayed super hard about my food issues (or really anything). I always think, "Ok this time, I'm gonna get it. This is the last time." Yeah, it never is. I can rock a diet hardcore for a few months. For example in January I ate completely vegan and gluten free for 3 months. Let me tell you, that was hard. I lost like 15 lbs but then picked them right back up on my way to the cookie company. I have many a story similar to that. But this blog, this story is different.
I can't do this thing on my own...obviously. I don't know if I will ever be "over it." But what I do know is that I have given it to God; laid down all the trying. I am surrendered. But you know what? There are times I want to pick it back up and try to do it on my own. That is why I have to hand it over to God 50 times a day. I must keep asking for His help. I am living in a posture of surrender. That's the only thing that is working for me...and I like it.